The Crazy Thing I Did for Love

I recently turned 29, and I have to admit that - for weeks beforehand - I was really dreading it. 29: it just sounded SO old! Never mind that many of my friends have turned 29 (and older!) with grace and poise, I was just nervous about it. I mean, it’s only 365 days from 30 and I think we all feel a little wary of that big number, don’t we?

At any rate, as I was celebrating with my family the weekend before my big day I indulged in a bit of reflection. What was the big deal about 29? I figured out that it just sounded so much older than I feel. I definitely feel like I’m a lot wiser and more mature at 29 than I was at 28, but I’m just not ready to be quite so grown-up. So I did something I’d been thinking about since we found out we were having a Henry (as opposed to a Heidi): I got a tattoo!

If you had asked me 2 years ago, I would have told you I would NEVER get a tattoo. It’s not that I’m morally opposed or anything like that. I just couldn’t have imagined an image I would want on my body forever. I mean, I wear my wedding ring every single day, but even that comes off in the shower. But in the past 11 months I have been transformed into a new person. It’s not just that I gave birth and so I felt like I could handle the pain of the tattoo. Nope, it was more that. I feel so much love and joy on the inside that I wanted to have a physical reminder that I could look at any time. And even though it hurt (still not nearly as much as labor, obviously) and I’m certain it’ll be my only tattoo ever, I’m so glad I got it. My parents were less than delighted when they found out, but I didn’t do this for anyone but me. And maybe a little bit for Henry. So when he grows up he can see that my love for him is so overwhelming that I just couldn’t contain it in my heart. It had to spill over to my ankle.

Happy (belated) Mother's Day!

Ah, Mother’s Day. I hope yours was phenomenal. I think it goes without saying that I have a brand new respect and awe for all moms everywhere this year, now that I know what motherhood is all about. I was blessed to be able to see the most important moms in my life this year. My mother in law had to work (boo!), but she joined us for breakfast in the morning to enjoy her beloved son and grandson. Then we went to visit my parents and grandparents in the afternoon, where my dad grilled up some delicious steaks. All in all, it was a wonderful day and I was so pleased to be able to join in the fun this year. Go mommies!
In honor of Mother’s Day, I would like to present the top 10 pieces of advice I received that I would like to pass on to other new mommies. So, with no further ado:

1. Sleep when your baby sleeps. This is a common one, but it’s SO easy to disregard. I was always really tempted to do housework during naptime, but trust me: the dishes will wait. Your mind and body need sleep to function and care for your baby.
2. Babies rarely cry for no reason. The top 3 reasons are that they’re hungry, have a dirty diaper, or are otherwise hurt or uncomfortable. If a feeding, burping, and new diaper don’t help, and your baby doesn’t appear to be in pain be patient and call the doctor. Which leads to …
3. ASK FOR HELP! Whether it’s from your mom, your doc, or your boss. People are usually VERY willing to help a new mom, but nobody can read minds. As for the doctor, call as often as you need to. It’s better to be safe than sorry. And, after all, that’s why you’re paying them all that money.
4. Boob is (almost) always the answer. If you’re breastfeeding, you have 2 perfect baby calmers in your arsenal. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Henry NOT calm down when presented with a nipple. I’ve read articles by moms around the world, and they all agree: a readily available breast equals a contented baby.
5. Your body WILL return to normal. Even after you get your pre-pregnancy jeans back on, there are adjustments to be made. It took me several months to figure out how to sleep with big, sometimes sore, constantly leaky boobs (sleep bra + hand towel, by the way). But eventually you’ll be you again. This is just one of those times when you have to roll with the punches and be patient.
6. It’s not forever. Even with the most pleasant baby, motherhood is NOT easy. But when you get stressed out and feel like you’d rather have a root canal than change one more diaper, just remember this: It’s not forever. Before you know it, your little one will have moved on to the next phase and you’ll have a whole new set of worries. J
7. You’re doing a great job! If you worry, plan, fret, stew, or feel concern for your baby (along with all the loving, rocking, feeding, singing, etc.), then you’re doing just fine and I hope someone tells you so every day.
8. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. This is true for you AND for baby. Of course you don’t ever want your munchkin hurt, but babies do fall. Don’t fuss too much (as long as s/he’s not serious injured!), and try to remember that babies learn by trial and error.
9. Trust yourself. Everyone will have words of wisdom for you, but it’s important to remember that this is your baby, and your instincts are usually pretty reliable. You know that little miracle better than anyone, after all, so listen to peoples’ advice, consider it, and then do what works best for you and your child.
10. This is the best job EVER! It’s very difficult, but I promise you it’s worth every moment of lost sleep when your baby falls asleep smiling in your arms, or reaches out for you, or gives you a big hug & kiss. So. Totally. Worth. It!